


Speak A Million Words

by owlways_and_forever



Series: The Mischief They Create [21]
Category: Harry Potter - J. K. Rowling
Genre: Alternate Universe - Boy Band, Alternate Universe - Celebrity, Alternate Universe - Modern Setting, Alternate Universe - Rock Band, Alternate Universe - Singer, Angst, Celebrity!AU, F/M, Fluff, Fluff and Angst, Singer!Au, band!au
Language: English
Status: In-Progress
Published: 2020-10-29
Updated: 2020-12-21
Packaged: 2021-03-09 02:13:34
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 2
Words: 6,643
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/27256990
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/owlways_and_forever/pseuds/owlways_and_forever
Summary: A chance meeting on the street leads to an unlikely friendship.
Relationships: James Potter/Lily Evans Potter
Series: The Mischief They Create [21]
Series URL: https://archiveofourown.org/series/1888561
Comments: 11
Kudos: 13





	1. Chapter 1

**Author's Note:**

> Hello friends! Welcome to the start of another multi-chap! If you've been with me on one of these rides before, you know that I'm not the most consistent updater. I write when I can and update when I finish a chapter. Please try not to let that dissuade you from reading! I try my best. And here's hoping I can break the pattern this time. Anyway, I hope you enjoy this fun little story! Happy reading!

_Nice to meet ya, what’s your name?_ _  
_ _Let me treat ya to a drink_

Lily walked down the street at a brisk pace, wishing she had thought to bring an umbrella with her. It wasn’t pouring yet, just a slow drizzle, but her suit was expensive and she didn’t want the rain to ruin the fabric. Lily kicked herself for the moment of vanity - it wasn’t like her, but she had splurged a bit when she’d been promoted and she didn’t want the money to go down the drain after only one wear. She was so focused on making her way home as fast as possible, that she barely noticed when her wallet slipped out from under her elbow.

She tapped out a quick succession of numbers on her phone screen, holding it up to her ear so she could hear the ring on the other line. As usual, the line rang and rang and no one answered.

“Tuney,” Lily sighed after the beep sounded indicating the voicemail was recording, “please call me back. I know you’re still mad, but I really do miss you. I just want to talk and…” Lily felt a tap on her shoulder and turned around, her jaw dropping instantly. “Tuney, I got to go.”

Lily hung up the phone and tried to make sense of her surroundings, because there was no way that who she thought was in front of her could possibly be real. It had to be a doppelganger. Because there was absolutely no way that the man standing before her could _actually_ be James Potter, rock god and international superstar, guitarist for The Marauders. There was no way he was here, in London, looking at her a bit shyly.

“Sorry, I think you dropped your wallet,” he said with a deliciously smooth voice that confirmed that this had to be James Potter, all while holding out her neat black leather wallet. 

“Thank you,” she answered, barely managing to make her voice louder than a whisper. Lily cleared her throat, trying to force some volume back to her vocal cords. “Thank you, I’d be totally screwed if I lost that.”

“Yeah, it’s a real pain having to cancel all your cards and stuff,” Potter replied casually, still holding her wallet out to her.

“It’s not that,” Lily said, smiling shyly and reaching out for the little wallet. “My ID for work is in it, and I can’t get into the building without it. And it’s a whole process to have to get a new one. I’d be in loads of trouble.”

She mentally kicked herself, realizing that she had probably said a bit too much. Why was it that it had been not even thirty seconds and already he seemed to completely disarm her?

“Well then, I’m very glad to be able to save you from trouble,” he answered with a grin. “I’m James, by the way.”

“Lily,” she replied, meeting his reached out hand with her own and giving it a firm shake.

“Lovely to meet you, Lily. Got any dinner plans?”

Lily was taken aback, his question entirely unexpected, and she felt herself flounder for a moment as she tried to process the motive behind it. Was he asking her out? That couldn’t be the case. Surely it was just some sort of gesture of reciprocity, a thank you of sorts. Except… _he_ found _her_ wallet, so really _she_ should be thanking _him._ She was flustered and confusing herself, and she really just needed to take a deep breath. _In. Out. Think._

“Um, nothing specific, no,” she answered vaguely, trying to suss out what was going on while she spoke.

“Want to grab a bite with me, then?” he asked, his lilting Irish accent sounding melodious even in speech.

“I…” Lily paused, not sure how to answer that. She still couldn’t figure out what was going on here or what he wanted.

“I don’t know anyone in London, you see,” he continued, offering something of an explanation. “Don’t really fancy spending the evening alone watching telly if it can be helped, and you seem like as lovely a person as any to get to know.”

“So you would’ve just asked any ol’ person on the street to dinner then,” Lily answered with a soft, teasing twinkle to her voice.

“I sure am glad that it’s you, though,” he quipped back, drawing a wide grin from Lily. “It’d be my treat, of course.”

“Alright then,” Lily agreed, deciding to trust him. Besides, when would she ever get the chance to meet a celebrity again? It’s not like they stopped by MI5 every day. “Lead on.”

They walked through the streets of London, meandering and chatting idly about nothing in particular. Lily wasn’t paying attention to their destination, her eyes skimming over the beautiful elaborate buildings they walked past. Westminster Abbey, Big Ben, the Houses of Parliament. It was a small thing that she loved about her job, that she was surrounded by all the gorgeous old government buildings and museums every day. It didn’t occur to her that James might be staying in a fancy hotel until they came to a stop outside the palatial exterior of the Corinthia. 

“You’re staying _here_?” she asked, her eyes widening.

“Yeah, they’ve got a suite designed for musicians, and…” He drifted off as he looked at her expression, an amused grin tugging softly at his lips. “What?”

“It’s just kind of crazy, that’s all,” Lily answered.

“Wait til you see the actual suite,” he said, pushing open the door to the grand hotel and holding it open for her. 

James guided her through the halls of the hotel and Lily tried not to gawk at the pristine marble floors and gilded walls. They took the elevator to the fifth floor and then walked along the hall until James stopped by a door marked ‘M’. He pulled out a key and unlocked the door, pushing it open. Lily stepped in after him, feeling her jaw drop.

It was bigger than her apartment, with a spacious living room and a baby grand piano in the corner. A small dining table stood next to it and there was a fireplace nestled in the wall by the sofa. To her right, a staircase wound upward to what she assumed was the bedroom. James smiled encouragingly as she tentatively stepped forward to explore, her eyes immediately drifting toward the view of London outside the windows. As she looked out at them, James dug through a drawer in the small kitchenette before handing her a menu that he had extracted.

“Just let me know what you want to eat,” he said. “I’ll order in a minute.”

Lily perused the menu - a mix of fancy fare and staple British comforts - before deciding on the potato gnocchi. James returned, holding out a hand for her coat, which Lily handed over, and then went back to the entryway. He tucked her coat into the closet and picked up a phone hanging on the wall. 

“Hello, Frank?” he said into it. “Yes, can you have an order of the gnocchi and the Corinthia Burger brought up from The Garden please? Thank you.”

“Room service?” Lily mused quietly.

“Something like that,” James shrugged, returning to the sitting room and plopping down on the sofa.

“Can I ask you something?” Lily said tentatively, sitting down next to him a bit more gingerly. 

“Sure,” he agreed, looking at her with bright eyes, curious what she might choose to ask him. There were undeniably all kinds of things one might ask a celebrity they’d just met.

“How is it possible that you don’t know anyone in London to hang out with tonight?” she asked at last, matching his curiosity with her own.

“Ah. Well, I’m not exactly from around here,” he answered, his Irish accent turning the simple words into a joke. “And you’d be surprised how few friends you make when you’re in a world famous band.”

“Am I supposed to feel sorry for you?”

“God no,” he laughed, shaking his head. “No, I just mean that there aren’t very many people in my phone to text. My parents still live in Ireland, and the boys from the band are scattered about.”

“Do you still talk to them?” Lily asked suddenly, her cheeks blushing as she realized how abruptly personal it was. “Only, you hear rumours… after the band split up. People seem to think you all hate each other now or something.”

“We don’t really talk very much, no, at least not all of us,” James said quietly. “But it wasn’t as dramatic as everyone says.”

“Will you tell me what happened?”

James hesitated, looking a little bit uncomfortable, and Lily immediately felt bad.

“I’m sorry, I shouldn’t pry, I was just -”

“No, it’s alright,” he said, shaking his head. “I’m basically a stranger and I asked you to come hang for the night, I think I owe you answers to a few questions. It really doesn’t make for a good story though, sort of just a chain reaction. Peter set things off. He felt like the label was controlling us too much, we couldn’t write the kind of music that we wanted anymore. We all sort of agreed. But the rest of us didn’t mind so much. At most we talked about splitting with the label and founding our own. We were famous enough at that point, we could’ve done it. But Peter decided that he wanted to do his own music. That age old tale of a band splitting up because someone wants to go solo.”

Lily nodded, surprised that it was so benign, but James went on.

“There were some hurt feelings, mostly because Peter announced it by going to a magazine before he even told us. He must have planned it for a while, because he had a lot of stuff ready for them by the time he did it,” James said, with his eyes focused on the fire now flickering in the fireplace. She remembered what James was talking about - the headlines and magazine exclusives when Peter said he was only a few weeks away from having his first single. “But then things just kept piling on. Remus had been struggling for a while. The fame wasn’t good for him, and the depression had gotten really bad. Honestly, I think he’d been considering it for a while, but he didn’t want to let the rest of us down. Peter leaving gave him an excuse to step away too. So he’s gone back to Wales now, he’s got a little cottage and a quiet life. I talk to him every now and then, and he seems happier. He wants to open a little bookshop or something, but he’s worried it’ll get mobbed when people discover he owns it.” 

“And Sirius?” Lily prompted, noting that James’ supposed best friend was conspicuously absent from this story.

“We just aren’t the same people who used to be friends,” James said with a shrug.

Lily could tell that there was more to the story than friends drifting apart, but it seemed unwise to press her luck.

“Well, I’m glad that you did split up,” she teased. “I’ll admit I like your music much better than the band’s.”

“Thank you, I think,” he replied, half laughing. 

Lily liked the way laughter looked on him, the way it made him look so light and carefree. 

A knock on the door told them that dinner had arrived, and James jumped up to go grab it. He was gone barely a minute before returning with two silver-covered plates that were fancier than anything Lily had ever seen before. At least as far as dinnerware was concerned.

“I believe this one is yours,” James said, setting the plate in his left hand down on the coffee table in front of her. “Actually, I have an idea. Follow me.”

Lily picked up her plate and followed him as he walked over to the staircase and began to climb up it. She had assumed that there was nothing upstairs but the bedroom, and so felt a little wary, but her instincts told her that she could trust him. At the top of the stairs, James pushed open one set to double doors to reveal his bedroom, but continued to walk straight through it to another door. He pushed that open as well, and Lily followed him out onto a long, skinny terrace. It was lined with short hedges, and a dining table stood closest to them. Beyond it were two outdoor sofas with a low coffee table between them and a fireplace at the far end of the terrace. To the right, Lily could see the Thames, illuminated by the windows of London’s South Bank. It took her breath away, and she could scarcely believe that London was this beautiful - it was like something out of an iconic photograph.

James grabbed a set of silverware from the dining table and made his way to one of the two sofas, leaving the one facing the Thames for Lily. She followed suit, exchanging the silver cover on her plate for silverware at the table and then taking a seat on the sofa. 

“So, where do you work?” James asked before taking a bite of his burger.

“For the government,” Lily answered. “I’m an intelligence analyst with MI5.”

“And you’re just allowed to tell me that?” he said, sounding both surprised and impressed. 

“Sure, I’m not a _spy_ ,” she laughed in reply. “I mean, I don’t broadcast it, but it’s not a secret.”

“What kind of things do you work on?” he pressed, clearly fascinated.

“Broadly - I work on domestic counterterrorism efforts,” she explained. “But I’m really not allowed to say more than that.”

“You must’ve been quite the academic then,” James observed.

“Yeah, Cambridge,” she said.

They continued chatting throughout dinner, learning little facts about each other. Lily talked about Petunia and Mary and the things she liked to do when she was out of work. To her surprise, James seemed to love history nearly as much as she did, and was constantly reading biographies and historical commentaries when he wasn’t trying to write music. It was those personal details about him that nobody knew that she enjoyed learning the most, far more than the trivial things.

By the time they had both finished eating, Lily was shivering just a little in the night air. James cleared their plates and ducked inside to grab a plush throw blanket from inside, laying it across her lap. He turned the fireplace on as well, letting the flames warm their skin. Maybe it was the fire or the softness of the blanket, but things suddenly felt intimate in a way they hadn’t before. Lily felt like cozying up to James, having him whisper gently in her ear. The idea alarmed her a bit, and she felt the need to check herself. Looking at her watch, she saw that it was 9pm, and it seemed like a reasonable time to excuse herself.

“I should probably go soon,” she said softly, her voice breaking as though her vocal cords were trying to keep the words inside. It’s not like she really wanted to say them anyway. “It’s… well not exactly late, but still. It’ll be getting on by the time I make it home.”

“You could always stay the night,” James offered. Lily raised an eyebrow at him, making him blush as he realized how his offer sounded. “I didn’t mean… there’s a second bedroom.”

“That’s really kind, but…” she paused. Why was she fighting so hard to find an excuse to leave? Propriety? It wasn’t 1890. She could stay over if she wanted to. She _really_ didn’t want the night to end. “Okay, sure.”

James’ smile lit up like the London Eye behind him and Lily felt her heart pound excitedly in response. God, he really was gorgeous. 

“You seeing anyone?” James asked, trying his best to sound casual about the question.

“Nope, you?” she countered with a grin.

“No, no one since… my last relationship ended in a bit of a mess,” he answered. “I’ve taken a bit of a break since then.”

“Right, makes sense,” Lily said, doubt suddenly sweeping over her. Of course he wasn’t interested in her, why would he be? She was just ordinary, after all. He belonged with someone like this girl, and clearly she still had a claim on his heart anyway. This was nothing to him, just some friendly company for a night. “I heard you’re a big football fan,” she said, changing the topic to something safer.

“Yeah, I love it, my dad and I used to watch all the Liverpool games when I was younger,” he replied. “Every weekend, at home or down the pub, we always had to watch Liverpool. It was a nice tradition.”

“My dad and I were the same,” Lily answered, smiling again. “Only for us it was Tottenham.”

“Ooh, Spurs girl, are you?” he teased.

“Til I die,” she confirmed with a laugh. 

They continued to talk, laughing vivaciously, until nearly one in the morning. James finally saw the time and the surprise was clear on his face. How they had been talking for so long when it felt like only minutes was entirely beyond both of them. Lily tried to stifle a yawn, but James mirrored it, smiling afterward.

“I guess we should probably call it a night, huh?” he said, suddenly feeling the late hour.

“I guess so,” Lily agreed.

“Come on, I’ll get you set up.”

He led her back into the suite, showing her to the spare bedroom. It was every bit as luxurious as the rest of the suite, with a large queen size bed and a state of the art tv. James handed her a sweatshirt, t-shirt, shorts and flannel pants as she ran her hands over the soft cotton comforter. 

“I don’t know what you want to sleep in, so it’s your choice. And I asked Frank to bring up a toothbrush for you.”

“Thank you,” Lily said, accepting his offer. 

“Um, the bathroom is just around the corner, just, you know, make yourself at home,” James said.

“Thanks,” she repeated, smiling gratefully. 

“I’ll see you in the morning?” he asked tentatively, somehow unsure if she would still be there when he woke up.

“Yeah, absolutely,” Lily smiled. “I assume this place has a killer breakfast.”

“It does,” James grinned, looking for all the world like she had just made his day. “Okay, well, goodnight then.”

“Goodnight, James.”


	2. Chapter 2

_ Can’t you tell that I want you baby? _

Lily swirled her beer in her glass, listening distractedly as Mary shared the details of her day, or at least as many as she felt comfortable with. Ever the rule-follower, Mary took her hippocratic oath very seriously, so there was very little that she actually said about her work. It worked well for them though, since there was nothing that Lily could share about hers, and allowed them to be even-footed.

“So, have you been on any dates lately?” Mary asked, surprising Lily with the abrupt change of topic.

“Er, no, not really,” she answered. “Honestly, I haven’t had much time outside of work. This is the first time I’ve done anything since… well, in a few weeks.”

_ Since I met James _ , she had wanted to say. But then she had remembered that he politely asked her not to mention to anyone she knew that she had met him. She hadn’t expected it to be so hard to keep that promise when she agreed. 

“Have you?” Lily asked, realizing that there might be a reason why her friend had brought up the unusual topic. 

“I did sort of meet someone,” Mary answered with a blush and a shy smile. “He’s a social worker and he’s at the hospital pretty often. His name is Fabian.”

Lily felt her phone buzz against the table and she looked down. James’ name appeared on the screen and Lily felt her heart leap, beating sporadically in her throat.

_ Want to come over? _

_ Pretty sure that new David Copperfield movie is On Demand now. _

Lily grinned at her phone, remembering the conversation she and James had over breakfast about the movies they liked and the ones they wanted to see. It was silly how happy it made her, but she got the sharpest spikes of joy any time James showed that he had been paying attention and remembered what she said. It mattered more with him, as much as she hated to admit it. It just did.

_ Be there in an hour? Getting drinks with a friend right now. _

Lily barely had to wait before an answer appeared on the little phone screen.

_ See you in an hour. _

“Okay come on, fess up,” Mary said, looking at Lily with a raised eyebrow. “Who’s making you smile like that?”

“It’s just Petunia,” Lily lied quickly, feeling a quick stab of guilt at the deception. “She’s finally talking to me again and it’s like old times. Well, almost.”

“Mhmm,” Mary replied skeptically. She looked like she didn’t really believe Lily, but Mary was always entirely willing to believe the best in people and she wouldn’t call Lily out. Not over something like this. Even if Mary knew for sure that Lily was lying, she would understand that there was a reason why. 

“I’m sorry, you were telling me about the guy,” Lily said, feeling bad for not paying as much attention as she really owed her friend.

“Fabian,” Mary added.

“Right, Fabian,” Lily confirmed, nodding. “So has he actually asked you out?”

“Just yesterday, actually,” she answered, the blush staining her cheek darkening a little bit. “We were eating lunch and he asked if I’d like to go out to dinner sometime and get away from the hospital.”

“Mary that’s great!” Lily had no trouble feeling genuinely excited for her best friend. She couldn’t imagine anyone who deserved happiness more, especially after the trauma she had experienced a few years earlier. It never failed to amaze Lily that despite what had happened to her, Mary remained as sweet and kind as ever, determined not to let her experience tear her down.

“He wanted to go tonight though,” Mary said softly, chewing on her bottom lip apprehensively.

Lily was quiet for a minute as she tried to read the situation. Normally, Mary would brush off anything that conflicted with girls’ night without a second thought, but this definitely seemed different. She hadn’t promptly volunteered that she’d declined the offer or rescheduled for another night, which meant she hadn’t.

“Oh my god, you want to go!” Lily laughed, a smile spreading across her cheeks. “Wow, you must really like this guy to duck out on girls’ night. I don’t think you’ve ever ditched me before. I’m not sure how I feel about it.”

“I don’t want to!” Mary protested, looking positively stricken. “Our schedules are just… I go on night shifts for the next month, and then it’s the holidays and…”

“Mary, it’s fine!” Lily reassured her friend, with as wide a smile as she could manage. “You should go, I’m only teasing you.”

“You really don’t mind?” Mary asked.

“Of course not,” she said emphatically. “This is important too, Mary. You should go out with Fabian and have fun and fall a little bit in love with him tonight. I’m exhausted anyway, I don’t mind an early night. It’s been a long week.”

“Thank you,” Mary whispered.

They finished their drinks and Mary insisted on paying the tab - since she was the one cutting out early after all. Lily felt bad about lying about the rest of her night, but there was nothing to do about it. She hugged Mary and wished her good luck with a quick kiss on the cheek before setting off in the direction of the Corinthia. 

The staff at the luxurious hotel knew her well after her frequent visits, and nobody so much as batted an eye when she walked through the doors and made her way to James’ apartment. It occurred to Lily that James must have told them that she was allowed to visit anytime and could see herself up, and the idea warmed her heart a little bit (though she tried very hard not to read too much into it - she was a friend, a companion, nothing more). She knocked on the door and seconds later James was opening it, standing on the other side with a pleased expression. 

“You’re early,” he said, stepping aside to let her in.

“Mary had a date to get to,” Lily shrugged, taking off her coat and slinging it over the banister of the stairs.

“Yeah, it’s a nice night for that, don’t you think?”

Lily opened her mouth to reply, but surprise kept any words stuffed tight in her throat like a wadded up piece of paper that she could have choked on. It certainly  _ sounded  _ like James was implying that they were on a date, but that was ridiculous. This was no different from any other time she’d come over, and those hadn’t been dates. And moreover, she couldn’t date James because… well because he was him. Even if she liked him an awful lot.

“So how was girls’ night?” James asked, breaking Lily out of her thoughts. 

“It was nice,” Lily shrugged, making herself comfortable on the sofa. “It always is. I wish you could meet Mary though, you’d like her. She’s sweet.”

“That would be nice, but rather less like a girls’ night,” James quipped, plopping down next to her.

“You know what I mean,” Lily replied, rolling her eyes.

“I have friends, you know,” he said.

“Just none in London.”

“Do you want to watch the movie or not?”

Lily grinned at the hint of irritation in his tone. It wasn’t true annoyance or the kind that said she had pushed too far and needed to walk it back. It was just enough to ruffle his feathers while amusing him at the same time.

“Yes please,” Lily answered with a grin.

James smiled back as he picked up the remote and began hitting the right sequence of buttons to pull up the movie. Lily put her feet up on the coffee table, rolling her ankle around once to crack the joint as she settled back into the couch.

“I ordered pizza for dinner,” James announced, looking very much like there was something on his mind. He didn’t seem to be in a forthcoming mood though, and Lily decided not to press the issue, at least not for the moment.

“Pizza sounds good,” she offered. 

“It should be here any minute,” he added, his thumb hesitating over the play button. “Do you want to wait to start the movie?”

“Sure, we might as well,” Lily answered. “Seems silly to have to stop it five minutes in when Frank knocks.”

“Frank is actually off duty, it’s Gideon tonight,” James said idly.

“Frank has the night  _ off? _ ” she gasped in a feign of shock.

“Well I’m not sure it was scheduled so much as his wife went into labour this morning and he thought he ought to be there for the birth of his son,” he quipped, a little bit of mirth returning to his features. “The effect is that he has the night off either way though, so yeah, I guess so.”

A knock on the door sounded then, interrupting at just the right moment. James stood to go get the pizza and Lily went to the little kitchenette to grab some plates and beers from the fridge. Meeting back up on the couch, they settled in for a moment, each grabbing a slice of pizza and getting comfortable, before hitting play on the film.

They watched the movie with surprisingly little interaction. James was almost completely silent throughout, and while it was a touch disconcerting, Lily didn’t entirely mind it in this instance. The movie - a drama - was serious enough that she was quite content to watch without any jokes or mockery. But still, he was quite enough that when the credits began to roll and Lily wiped the tears from her eyes, she felt quite concerned. Looking over at him, she saw that he looked quite anxious, and wondered what was bothering him.

“Are you alright?” Lily asked, turning to face James with a serious expression as she turned the television off. “You seem a bit… I dunno, tense, I guess.”

“I - Lily, I -” he struggled, seemingly unable to find the words he needed, his cheeks growing more flushed. 

“James, I can’t tell if I should be worried or not, will you please just tell me what’s going on?” she asked again, her own anxiety starting to mount. “Are you leaving London?”

“No!” he answered hurriedly. “It’s just that I wanted to… oh bugger it!”

He leaned forward quickly, his lips catching hers in a somewhat hasty and awkward kiss, until his hand found the nape of her neck to cradle. As Lily responded to his touch, they allowed the kiss to deepen slightly, neither lacking in passion nor driven by lust. It had all the innocence of a first kiss with all the feeling of the deepest love. When he pulled away again, his expression was a bit sheepish, the most shy Lily had ever seen him look.

“What brought that on?” Lily asked, smiling warmly in hopes that it would convey that his affection was not at all unwelcome.

“I’ve wanted to kiss you since the first night we had dinner,” James confessed, boldly meeting her gaze.

“Took you long enough then,” she teased, laughing melodically.

“I wasn’t sure if you -”

“How could I not?” Lily answered, reaching out to grab the collar of James’ shirt and pull him in to her once more.

When he pulled her onto his lap, she could feel how much he wanted her and balked at the idea. It wasn’t that Lily was a prude or inexperienced - she’d had her share of boyfriends and hookups. But the thought of Petunia, about to marry a guy she didn’t really love and her family hated, all because she’d gotten pregnant, popped into her head and tore her attention away, dampening the lust that had been coursing through her. It didn’t matter that their parents and Lily had insisted that they didn’t care if Petunia wasn’t married, they would support her and love her and help her if she wanted to have her child on her own. Petunia wasn’t ready to admit that Vernon was awful. It was what they’d fought about, and it was all just too real for Lily. What if that happened with James? Not that she was really worried about him turning out to be an asshole, but what if he knocked her up and then just… took off to go tour the world and never spared her a second thought? Oh god, what if he’d done that to some other woman? He could have a whole string of little children out there, totally abandoned… Lily felt her mind spiralling and pushed away from James, taking a deep breath to steady herself.

“You okay?” he asked, eyebrows furrowed with concern.

“Yeah, I just… I don’t know,” she sighed, raising her eyes to meet his. “I just think I need to not go further than this tonight.”

“Okay,” James agreed without hesitation. “You’re the boss.”

Lily rolled her eyes - relationships were about being equal, nobody was the boss - but she smiled as well. She understood what James was really saying - that he wasn’t going to pressure her into doing anything she wasn’t comfortable with - and she appreciated it. She stood up and took his hand, and for a moment, she saw confusion flicker across his features.

“C’mon, it’s almost time for the Graham Norton show,” she said, trying to make her thoughts a little more clear.

It was the perfect night for cuddling up close.

James followed her upstairs to his bedroom and tossed Lily her favourite pair of his flannel pajamas. They both changed into comfy clothes and crawled into the spacious bed, Lily immediately curling up into James’ side with her head against his shoulder. He flipped through the channels until he reached BBC One and idly wondered who the guests would be tonight. 

They had missed the introduction, tuning in as Norton sat with Benjy Fenwick, a young and nerdy-seeming actor who had captured the hearts of most of England and utterly overwhelmed himself. He blushingly shared some amusing anecdotes from his childhood and his education, much to the delight of the audience and only managing to endear himself further to the country.

The next guest was a petite little comedian by the name of Dorcas. Neither Lily nor James had seen her before, but they both found themselves chuckling at her commentary. James began to drift off as the third guest appeared, and he couldn’t have begun to guess who it was. But the fourth and final guest had him sitting bolt upright in bed, startling Lily as he glared at the tv.

Smiling and laughing on the screen was none other than Sirius Black.

James felt his features darken and his thoughts cloud at the very sight. He watched as Sirius barked out a boisterous laugh and stole the show completely, and James was reminded of many a day when he felt completely unseen as he stood beside Sirius, even on a stage in a stadium filled with thousands of people. 

“Let’s get some sleep, okay?” Lily asked, reaching out to push back James’ hair and smoothing the wrinkles that had appeared on his forehead. 

She reached out for the remote, intending to turn it off, but James held onto with a firm grasp. A twisted part inside of him wanted to know what his former best friend would say - would there be disparaging remarks about the band? Snide hints at how he was better off now? Comparisons between the solo careers of each of them? James could imagine all the things Sirius might say and felt his anger rising at the mere thought of it.

“James,” Lily said, trying again to turn his attention away from the tv. “Come on, let’s go to sleep.”

She gently turned his chin until he was looking at her, and waited a moment, staring into his lovely hazel eyes until she saw the tension leave his shoulders and his expression clear. Lily left delicate kisses along his jawline and smiled when she saw his eyes flutter closed, all thought of Sirius gone. Carefully, she slipped the remote from his hand and flicked the television off, rewarding James with another kiss. When she pulled back, he smiled at her, marveling at her ability to immediately make him feel better.

“You’re right, time for bed I think,” he murmured, lying back down and pulling Lily in close, tucking her into his side.

Lily sighed and made herself comfortable, nuzzling into James and spreading her hand across his chest so she could feel his heart beating against it. She was so content as she drifted off, she couldn’t possibly imagine what dreams might be better than her reality that night.

o . o . o

Lily woke in the morning to find James still sleeping soundly beside her and she smiled to herself. It felt good being snuggled up next to him, wearing his soft flannel pajamas. So much better than she could have imagined it would feel. She leaned over and pressed a delicate kiss to his temple and then slipped out of the comfortable bed. Padding silently down the stairs, she made her way to the little kitchenette and grabbed the electric tea kettle (not her favourite kind, but it would do). Lily filled it up with water and flipped it on, getting two mugs out and popping tea bags inside. When the water was boiling, she poured a mug for herself, leaving James’ for the moment. It was entirely possible that he wouldn’t be up more than an hour yet. She let her tea steep for a few minutes - she liked it strong, much to her mother’s horror - and grabbed some shortbread from the tin James kept and fetched the newspaper from the hallway outside. When her tea was ready, she took it and the shortbread over to the sofa and curled her feet under her. Engrossed in her newspaper, Lily didn’t hear James wake up and make his way downstairs until he was standing in front of her.

“You’re still here,” he said, blinking sleepily as surprise coloured his voice.

“Oh,” Lily murmured, her cheeks blushing in embarrassment as the idea that this might not have been to James all it was to her occurred to her for the first time. “I didn’t mean -”

“No! Oh, I’m sorry,” he interrupted hastily, realizing what his greeting must have sounded like to her. “I didn’t mean that you shouldn’t be here still, I’m glad you are. I just thought… when I woke up, you weren’t there, I thought you’d gone, that’s all.”

“Okay,” she said hesitantly, still not entirely convinced.

“I really am glad that you’re still here,” James insisted, bending down to give her a quick kiss. “You should stay here all day. Tonight too. And tomorrow. Frankly, I wouldn’t mind if you never left.”

Lily giggled a little at his teasing, allowing him to set her mind at ease. She didn’t want to doubt what was between them, and she was going to do her best not to.

“There’s water in the kettle, it might still be hot,” she said, reaching up for one more kiss before he turned his attention toward getting breakfast.

“Thank you!” he called over his shoulder.

A few minutes later, James returned to the sofa with his own cup of tea and the entire tin of shortbread (Lily snagged one more). He smiled at the sight of Lily - clad in his flannels, cup of tea in one hand and newspaper in the other. There was just something so perfect about the moment.

“I don’t want to ruin anything, but…” James started shyly, “I don’t think we should tell anyone about this.”

“Oh,” Lily frowned, a little bit disappointed.

“It’s just that, I really want to keep seeing you, to  _ date _ you,” he continued on hastily, doing his best to make Lily understand the thoughts in his mind. “But once people find out that I’m with someone, it all just goes south in a hurry. I’ve tried this enough times to know that  _ we _ need to be confident in what we’re doing before bonkers people on the internet start weighing in. Because they are  _ nuts _ , Lily.”

“Wow, you make this all sound so irresistible,” she snarked, adding a smile to let him know that she was only teasing him. “If it’s what you think is best though, that’s fine. We can keep it secret for a little while.”

“You’re okay with that?” he asked apprehensively.

“Well, not forever, but to start with, sure,” she shrugged. “Maybe we just agree to like… okay, how about this? If this is still working for us in a month, we’ll talk about it again then. Maybe each month - assuming we’re still together - we decide who can know. I really don’t want Mary or Petunia or my parents to find out that I’ve been dating you because they see a picture in a tabloid somewhere. So maybe each month we just figure out where our little bubble stops, okay?”

“I really like the idea of us together for months,” he whispered, leaning over to kiss her and whispering the words into her lips. “Years even.” 

Lily hummed happily. She rather liked the sound of that too.

**Author's Note:**

> Opening song: Nice to Meet Ya by Niall Horan
> 
> Comments are always welcome, I love to hear from ya!


End file.
